The phone rang as I was sitting down to my anticipated evening meal, and as
I answered it I was greeted with, “Is this Wilhiam Wagenhoss?”
This didn’t sound anything like my name, so I asked, “Who is calling?”
The telemarketer said he was with The Rubberband-Powered Freezer Company or
something like that and then I asked him if he knew “Wilhiam” personally
and why was he was calling this number.
I then said off to the side, “Get really good pictures of the body and all
I then turned back to the phone and advised the caller that he had entered
a murder scene and must stay on the line because we had already traced this
call and he would be receiving a summons to appear in the local courthouse to
testify in this murder case.
I then questioned the caller at great length as to his name, address, phone
number at home, at work, whom he worked for, how he knew the dead guy, and
could he prove where he had been about one hour before he made this call.
The telemarketer was getting very concerned and his answers were given in a
I proceeded to tell him we had located his position at his work place and
the police were entering the building to take him into custody. At that point,
I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of his running away.
My wife asked me as I returned to our table, why I had tears streaming down
my face and so help me, I couldn’t tell her for about fifteen minutes. My
meal was cold, but oh-so-very enjoyable.